100% Fake! I mean REAL!

Yes, this is a spoof video. I made it a couple days ago. Make sure you watch the whole thing. Let me know what you think!

Only Read This If You Care

       Ok so I get that its all trendy and whatever to bash social networking sites like you're above all that shit or whatever- but I don't understand why people are always complaining about Facebook statuses and Twitter updates saying stuff they don't care about.  You know how people are always like "I don't care if you're waiting for the bus!" or "Why do I have to read that you're brushing your teeth??" etc.
      Ok, lets talk about regular daily life off-line for a second.  I can't remember the last time someone told me something in person and I actually gave a shit.  Ok that's an exaggeration and I'm not that much of a douchebag, but the point I'm making still stands.   Why would online be any different?  Like 50% of our waking hours are filled with people saying stuff to you that you don't really care about.  And its way worse than online, because when someone writes a facebook status that you don't care about you can always stop reading it once you realize its not interesting.  In the regular world, you can't stop the person from talking.  And not only that, but you often have to pretend you care when you don't- which can be exhausting sometimes.
    When you're behind a computer you don't have to do any of that, so how annoying can it really be?
    Toughen up, girl scout.
  

MOVE BITCH SLEEPOVER

Child support.

Beauty

      I don't know if I should pursue a career in design or see a psychiatrist, but either way I want to make love to the following inanimate objects:

Sobe Bottles

iPhone Box (The Actual Box)

Almost Any Longboard (But Definitely This One)

      Now I don't mean I'd want to have sex with these objects right now as a human being, you perverts, I mean like if I were also an inanimate object and I happened to see one of the things above at like a bar for inanimate objects, I'd totally slip something in the inanimate object's drink and inanimately f*ck the living shit out of him/her/it.

      Nothing like weird or anything.

      Plus, longboards aren't really inanimate when they're rolling, right?

Sector 9 Tree Barrel Sidewinder Longboard, SoBe Smooth Pina Colada Drink - 20-Fl. Oz. Bottles (Pack of 12)